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Alright, let’s talk about this “calls chinese takeout from jail” thing. You know, it sounds crazy, right? Like somethin’ outta a movie. But hey, stranger things have happened, I reckon.
First off, you gotta wonder, how the heck does someone even do that? I mean, you’re in jail! Ain’t got no phone, no nothin’. Well, I guess they got ways, these folks. Maybe they sweet-talked a guard, maybe they smuggled somethin’ in. Who knows? People are sneaky, always findin’ a way.
Now, why would someone wanna order Chinese takeout from jail, anyway? That’s the real question. Maybe they’re just plain hungry. Jail food ain’t exactly known for bein’ tasty, is it? Probably just slop, the kind you wouldn’t feed your dog. So yeah, I get it. You’re stuck in the slammer, you want somethin’ good to eat. A little bit of comfort, you know?
- Maybe they were missin’ home.
- Maybe it was a special occasion, like a birthday or somethin’.
- Or maybe they just had a hankerin’ for some sweet and sour chicken. Can’t blame ’em for that, I guess.
But here’s the thing, it ain’t gonna be easy. First, you gotta get the money. Jail ain’t free, you know. Then you gotta find a restaurant that’ll deliver to a jail. That’s a tough one. Most places, they ain’t gonna wanna get involved. Too much hassle. And even if you find a place, how you gonna pay ’em? You can’t exactly hand ’em cash through the bars.
I heard tell of this fella, he was locked up, and he was missin’ his wife’s cookin’ somethin’ fierce. So, what does he do? Convinces one of the new guards, young kid, barely dry behind the ears, to order him some chow mein. Said it was his birthday, the poor fella. Guard felt bad, I guess. Used his own phone, his own money even. Got the food delivered to the back gate, pretended it was for him. That fella got his Chinese food alright, but the guard? Got fired quicker than a scalded dog when they found out.
It’s a risky business, this jail takeout thing. You’re breakin’ the rules, that’s for sure. And if you get caught, well, you’re gonna be in even more trouble. Longer sentence, maybe solitary confinement. Not worth it, if you ask me. But hey, people do crazy things when they’re desperate or hungry.
Then there’s the other side of it. What if you’re the restaurant takin’ the order? You get a call, someone wants a big order, but it’s goin’ to the county jail. What do you do? Most places would just hang up, think it’s a prank. But some, maybe they’re desperate for business, or maybe they’re just curious, they might take the order. But it’s risky for them too. Cops might get involved, ask questions. Nobody wants that kind of trouble.
I remember hearin’ about this fella, owned a little Chinese place, got a call from the jail, just like I was sayin’. He thought it was a joke at first, but then the guy on the phone, he sounded serious, offered to pay extra. So, the owner, he figures, what the heck, it’s just food. Delivers the food, gets paid, no problem. But then, a week later, cops show up at his door, askin’ all sorts of questions. Turns out, the guy in jail, he used a stolen credit card to pay for the food. The restaurant owner, he didn’t know nothin’ about it, but he still got dragged into the whole mess. Lost business, had to hire a lawyer, it was a real headache.
So, yeah, “calls chinese takeout from jail”… it’s a wild story, makes you think. About how far people will go for a little bit of comfort, or a taste of home. But it’s also a reminder that there are consequences for everything we do, and sometimes, that plate of sweet and sour chicken just ain’t worth it.
You better think twice before you try somethin’ like that. Jail ain’t no joke, and breakin’ the rules ain’t gonna get you nowhere fast. Stick to the straight and narrow, that’s what I always say. And if you’re hungry, well, maybe just eat the slop and dream of better days.
Tags: [jail, takeout, chinese food, prison, food delivery, rules, consequences, risk, comfort food, crime]